Do you know how long it takes to get to NYC?
Well, have a seat and let me tell you about my journey.
First we left Virginia at 11am
With coffee and bagels and a big grin.
But our moods were very quickly changed
When 45 minutes into the trip, the highway looked deranged.
There were vehicles in a long red line,
Still we had good music so we didn’t really mind.
Do you know how long it takes to get to NYC?
Well, Washington was as messy as messy could be.
And when one GPS says I-395 and another I-495,
You can imagine where we might arrive…
Our cars were all miserably turned around,
And I sat angrily in the passenger seat not making a sound.
Because I knew my directions were right
But alas, I was told to keep my lips tight!
Do you know how long it takes to get to NYC?
Well, it seems a whole lot longer when you have to pee.
In fact I don’t remember much from Baltimore
BECAUSE I LITERALLY THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO PEE ON THE FLOOR.
We made it to the Maryland House restrooms just in time,
After taking “the scenic route” through D.C. in it’s prime.
So then we thought maybe that was the worst of it,
Of course we never could have guessed how much traffic we’d hit.
Do you know how long it takes to get to NYC?
Well, it was a RIDICULOUSLY long time for me.
The New Jersey turnpike wasn’t so bad,
But the George Washington Bridge made me so flipping mad.
We waited for THREE HOURS for who the heck knows,
And then there were crazy tolls and horn blows,
And six lanes merging on one lane of a road
And curse words and cops… everyone was about to explode.
(Oh and if you think I will EVER use this bridge again
You are FREAKING CRAZY, my friend!)
Do you know how long it takes to get to NYC?
Well, if you’re coming from Richmond like my family,
12 hours and 30 minutes seems to be normalcy.